24th May 2006

It's cold and rainy outside even though the date on my calender tells me it's the end of May.

I'm on my period and feel sweaty and tormented, and it's caused me to wake up really early. Most of all I feel fat and miserable.

I have a nasty habit of looking at things retrospectively and then dwelling on them as though they are important when they aren't. If I had stuck to the Cambridge Diet since my first ever post on this here blog I'd be around 5 stones (70Ib's / 31.8kgs) lighter.
Instead I'm ....... I'm ashamed to say I've just weighed myself and the scales say 20st and 2Ibs (127.9kgs / 282Ibs).

I feel so tormented. I can't sleep at all hence the reason why I've snuck in and used this computer (my computer isn't working, I need to reload Windows).

I invested in some scales so that I could keep my own track on my weight. I've just weighed myself and the scales read as follows:

Weight: 20st 2Ibs [127.9kgs]
Body fat percentage: 45%
Body Water percentage: 33%

BMI - 41.6437 (courtesy of NHS Direct)

(If your BMI is over 40 you're very obese. This means you're seriously over the ideal weight for your height. Are you eating too many foods that are high in fat and sugar? In order to lose this extra weight you need to make positive changes to your lifestyle and stick to them. Losing weight will help prevent severe health problems such as heart disease and diabetes and extend your life expectancy.)

This has got to stop!!! Ideally:

Weight: 11st 2Ibs [70.9kgs]
Body fat percentage: 25%
Body Water percentage: 50%
BMI - 18-24 (courtesy of NHS Direct)

Problem I need to stop listening to the detractors who tell me I look fine, because I don't.