Wednesday 23rd August

I had a fitness test yesterday, but I forgot to post the results, so here goes:

My Systolic Blood Pressure is: NORMAL
My Dastolic Blood Pressure is NORMAL

My resting heart rate is: 72 beats per minute - which is just within average, so I'm not so unfit! However I'd like to lower it to 60 as it was a two years ago. It's worth bearing in mind that I've always been heavy, so I think I've done' pretty darn well all these years.

My BMI: 42.77 - really bad!

THREE STONES ( 42Ibs = 19kilograms) by Christmas! I'll do it!

I've been Ok today. I don't feel full - which is great. It means I haven't over eaten to a huge extent. I am trying honestly gov!

I went to Next and saw so many clothes that would suit the slim size12/14 me! I can't wait.

My weight: 20stones 4pounds STILL but that's OK, as it's still better than 20st 8Ibs or putting weight on. I just can't weight to get stuck into Cambridge and banish my demon once and for all.

I'm not looking forward to sitting in the aeroplane seat on Sunday ..... I'm just looking forward to being back on Sunday God willing and creating the new me.

Please keep reading, please keep posting your comments - I am so grateful for the kind words you write and knowing people are out there routing for me is encouraging.

xxxx

Tuesday 22nd August

My computer is on it's last legs...... eeak! Anyoen out there wanna buy me a new one?! LOL

Today wasn't a bad day. I have been trying to be good since Monday. My weight is still 20st 4Ibs, but i'd rathe that, than it go up. I really believe I can reach my goal by my next birthday, but most importantly acheive 3 stones weight loss before Christmas.

I went to the gym and FINALLY had an induction, so at least I have a programme to follow. I also went swimming - something I should have done yesterday. I have no idea how many lengths I swam, circa 15 I reckon. I found my rythm and just kept going and I feel great for it. I'm really really looking forward to getting to grips with Cambridge.

Thanks for listening.

xxxx

Monday 21st August

I wanted to go to the gym today. Didn't make it as work finished too late. My knees are still hurting so fancied a awim, but no time.

Going to the doctors tomorrow, I'm going to ask him to test my cholesterol levels. There's no point in discussing my knees, he'll tell me I need to eat less and exercise more - which is true. I'm going to Ireland for a week next week and I'm draeding it. I don't know how my self-control will be.

I'll have to take things easy, until I come back to Britain so I can't tear into the Sole Sourcing.

Lots of love all xxx

MONDAY 21st August

Current weight 20st 4Ibs - 128.8kgs

20th August 2006

Current weight: 20st 8 Ibs (288 Ibs - 130.6 kgs)

It's my 29th Birthday today. I went out and had a nice time. My bust is huge at the moment!

I took a lot of old stuff to the charity shop today - clothes that are too tight or just don't fit. I figured that I won't want to wear them even when I've lost enough weight to.

My bones ache and click and I'm having trouble going up and down stairs. Even getting up off of chairs is a struggle for me now.

For the first time ever I'm feeling the strain of being overweight.

I have exaclty 52 weeks to make amends with my body and the abuse I've hurled at it for 29 years.

I pray that I can muster the confidence in myself to believe I can do it - this is what has stoppped me befire; the lack of belief in myself.

Thanks for listening. Off to bed now .... 4:45AM in the morning!

Please don't be annoyed with me.

I haven't been following the diet ..... no real reason as to why. I just haven't. Last week Friday I had my soup and depressed over it.

Don't worry I'm confident I can lose 3 stones by Christmas and reach my goal weight before my 30th birthday.

My friend is in Belfast at the moment and wants me to come visit her for my birthday weekend ..... (tis my birthday on Sunday), should I go or should I save my money?

I think personally I don't feel able to do this diet with a holiday on the horizon ... what I want is a whole 4-6 weeks free of anything so I can concentrate on the diet. I don't want to be thinking about Cambridge shakes on holiday - it just isn't a holiday then is it?

I love you all ......

3rd August 2006

I honestly haven't been as committed as I was last week. I got very cocky and reaped the consequences! I've just weighed myself, I'm now 280Ibs (20 stones) not the 282Ibs (20 stones and 2Ibs) I was last week, so by Saturday I should have at least expelled the water I've accumulated due to the carbs I've eaten.

Today will be the day I get back on board fully. Yesterday was a good day, apart from me needing the toilet a zillion times. I live about 50 miles away from where I work so you can imagine the sheer inconvenience of having to up ones water to at least 2.25 litres per day. I think I managed 3 litres in total with black herbal (rooibos) tea making up about 0.25 litres of my intake.

Apparently the more water I drink the easier it will be and the more weight I lose. I hear of people sinking 6 litres per day - how on God's green earth do they do that?!!! :-)

Much love ........

Foxxy!